If you want to be one with the crowd then you better be shocked every time you hear it. “It’s because of these Americans. With all these American programs on television. All the young kids just want to do sex and drugs. Even the girls!” said this lady to me shaking her head sadly at the topic. She looked so disturbed I had to ask.
“So did you know anyone personally? I mean who got influenced by Americans?”
“What is there to know personally? It’s in the papers everyday!”
I had to subscribe to her paper. Really there were reports every day? And why was it more shocking that even girls were doing it? Since when did the responsibility of good behavior of society fall on the girls’ shoulders? Oh wait…always! And more importantly why were the Americans the flag bearers for anything and everything related to Sex?
“So I’m guessing Russians are not into sex and drugs?”
“Why?” asked the lady. “Don’t they watch American television too?”
Ironically the country with the most liberal views on sex is…Israel! But I didn’t have the heart to tell the lady. She had chosen her enemy, the sole conspirator responsible to bring down the Indian youth.
But I don’t really understand why we are so hypocritical about sex? Indians wrote the Kamasutra. One of the three pillars India stands on to woo foreigners, other two being Gandhi and Taj Mahal.
What’s a big deal about sex? For a population whose only past time other than cricket seems to be having unprotected sex. I really don’t understand the ‘shyness!’
I know parents who don’t let their girls hang out with boys or go out with them. “We are very strict with Anu; we don’t want to encourage wrong things” they will say proudly. A pride that makes sense only to them and to no one else, think of the confusion it creates in the youngster’s mind. So Anu is thinking “Amit and I are in the same class, we travel to college together, we see each other the whole week at college but it’s wrong to hang out at Café Coffee Day on weekends! Hmm?!”
Confusion creates curiosity and curiosity will always trump any common sense.
How can we forget our own emotional hormonal roller coaster at Puberty Park?
It starts with crushes on cheesy looking celebrities. Rahul Roy had crazy female fan following.
Yup! That guy, whose hair covered his face throughout the movie, if that doesn’t highlight the craziness that puberty brings I don’t know what does.
Then starts the ‘puppy love’ no idea why it’s called so? Puppies are the last thing on the minds of charged up teenagers. And it’s this phase which shapes and develops a young person’s healthy attitude towards sex. Instead of dramatizing sex let’s be open about it. The fact is that there is a growing number of young men and women who are confident of themselves and their bodies. They know what they want in a relationship and are not ashamed of it. SEX is not a 4 letter word anymore!
You can put your kid in girls’ school, boys’ school, no school; put them on top of a mountain
They will reach sexual puberty; they will think about sex and will want to have sex. When they are going through these throes of hormones and changes, it’s better to talk about it openly with them, talk about protection, and have discussions.
I had a friend who got married after her post grads, a month after the wedding we started chatting online, and she asks me how to have sex? She was serious and didn’t know whom to ask. The best part was her husband didn’t either. He apparently had never been with a girl before and was very happy with the hand held version of his ‘equipment’.
More than the how of sex, the why of sex is also important. It is an evolution of a relationship between consenting adults. It is literally and figuratively union of two bodies, minds and souls. Ironically it’s not such a big deal if a boy engages in pre marital sex, but it’s a complete no no if a girl engages in one. A relationship may flourish or ebb away and sex cannot be used as a tool to brand the individuals especially women when it fails.
We have to take pressure off sex, instead of over analyzing it. One of the dumbest observations being the preposterous concept of virgin bride! The understanding being that the sole purpose of a woman is to be preserved and presented for the pleasure of man. I’m sure this is how the Christmas Turkey feels too!
And why the various phases to sex? Pre marital, post marital, extra marital and then comes the absurd gradation to sex; make up sex, break up sex, one night sex, wild sex and what not sex.
Seriously do we need a caste system here as well? The religious conservative pompous asses will frown on all forms of ‘marital’. According to them the purpose of sex is to reproduce like in the animal kingdom, other than that what is the need to have sex?
Sex is natural to the body, humans were meant to have sex or we wouldn’t have been built the way we are. Women have to stop associating sex with guilt, shame and negativity. It’s pleasurable and like everything in life has consequences emotionally and physically, just be smart about it.
We should embrace our humanness and all that comes with it and not necessarily look at the animal kingdom. Do you know what happens to drones after they mate with the queen bee?
Their testicles explode!
To all those puritans out there, may you be reborn as the humble drone.